Good & Ready

Doors Open

2006-05-29T17:58:57Z

Click here to see what's behind those 'Doors Open' doors.

Mixtape - Cherry Blossom Edition

2006-05-11T02:06:44Z

I've been collecting the songs for my Easy Mixtape for a couple of weeks now. I've heard and recognized a bunch, but kept forgetting to put them up here and just scribbled them down instead. Here are tracks 12 to 17.

12. Breakfast in America - Supertramp
13. Jammin' - Bob Marley
14. Disco Inferno - 50 Cent
15. Yeah - Usher
16. Could You Be Loved - Bob Marley (again, same person driving around the block maybe?)
17. Hypnotize - Notorious BIG

This bunch seems to be heavy on the hip hop and reggae, must be the warmer weather. Either way, sounds ok to me. Almost done ... guess I'll quit at 20.

Some pretty blossoms. So pretty in fact, that as I was driving home from work, I noticed them, stopped the car, got out, and took these pictures. My god - it's so pink! I love it!

My life in pictures

2006-05-08T03:24:30Z

There's a bunch - you might get bored.

I've been lying around in the grass sometimes.

From the 32nd floor of the Four Seasons Hotel at Avenue & Bloor. The most breathtaking view of the city I've seen in a long time. To the east and to the west, all was green. There's no doubt that summer is on the way.

I've always wanted to see what it was like behind the scenes of a television show. I suppose the Royal Canadian Air Farce is just as good as any. It was kind of interesting to see how they do it, even if the jokes weren't always so funny.

It's mostly just sitting around and waiting for the magic to happen. For a half hour show, the taping lasted one and a half hours.

With all those cameras pointed at them, it's almost like a firing squad. Only (a tiny bit) funnier.

All I remember is the ball scratching. And something about Ebay. The cameras all crowd in around the set, so the live studio audience has to watch the action on the monitors. It's kinda like watching it at home except, oh, right ... I never watch Royal Canadian Air Farce at home.

It was all worth it to wander around the CBC building for a while. I'm completely fascinated by it, particularly their cavernous prop storage facilty. We briefly considered pulling a 'Today's Special/Mannequin' and spending the night there.

More of the wonderful same.

The Wall of Fame is filled with childhood icons and some completely unfamiliar (to me) nostalgia. It was so retro.

The tree house from Mr. Dressup. Could be real, could be a replica.

Last I heard, Casey and Finnigan bought a cute little condo on West Queen West. They sell antiques at the St. Lawrence Market every other Saturday. True story.

One little chair for one of you, and a bigger chair for two to curl up in, and for someone who likes to rock, a rocking chair in the middle.

My friend Nichola's boyfriend, Ian, is in a band, the Thomas Matheson band. Good old fashioned rock and roll. Me likey.

At night, the blue lights in this tree outside my bedroom window give my room a soothing cool glow. In the daytime, when the sun glints through the leaves, I can sometimes be convinced that I'm living in the country.

Serious pavement pounding. Serious. Like my feet still hurt a little. But in a good way.

Avtomotive Bvilding. Oddly enough, not a single auto in the whole place. But plenty of hot broads. (get it!? hot broads ... hot rods ... haahahaa

For the black collar worker, who doesn't know that he's had a goth sticker on his back all afternoon! Hilarious! Seriously, let's all go as goths for Hallowe'en!

Pretty flowers are pretty. What else do you want me to say?

I quite like that angel hiding behind the trees like that.

The ride home (pit stop for beer and nachos not shown)

Free BJs

2006-04-26T04:19:47Z

I got free tickets to tonight's Blue Jays' game, so, along with Edie and Andie, I took myself out to the ball game. They won (3-7) and I'm becoming increasingly emotionally invested in the success of this team. What's becoming of me?! A couple of weeks ago, I spent Saturday AND Sunday in hockey arenas. Tonight, baseball at the 'dome. I am becoming that which I despise. But it was, admittedly, a lot of fun, so fuck all the haters.

Nacho Party

Sausage Party

Gettin' this part-ay start-ay-ed (that doesn't make sense)

Knitting her very own black and blue Jays sweater?

Taco party

Almost a taco party

Sitting pretty

KKK for Team Chacin - it's not what you think.

Just like Tyra would say, "Fierce".

My favourite part ... the world's fastest grounds crew. So fast, in fact, that by the time I got my camera out, they were already done and on they're way out. Fuckin' A!

That's it ... just want to put these photos for the ladies to nab, if they so desire.

Easy Mixtape - Out Like A Lamb Edition

2006-04-08T18:00:21Z

Today, from the street noise, a clear and resonant melody:

Enjoy The Silence - Depeche Mode. It's track #11 on my Easy Mixtape.

I've been sitting here with the windows closed most of the winter, so there haven't been very many songs to hear, save the myriad portuguese (spanish? italian?) folk and techno songs - if I can't identify the songs, they don't make it to the mixtape, which is too bad, 'cause some of those songs sound good. It's nice though to recognize something for a change. And I have a feeling that if I sat here long enough today, I might hear enough to fill up my mixtape. It's bright and sunny and there is no rational explanation for why I'm siting at my computer catching up on a week's worth of celebrity gossip when I should be outside, doing something.

I could probably use a good dose of vitamin D; exposure to the sun helps our bodies make vitamin D. UV rays from sunlight trigger vitamin D synthesis in the skin, creating vitamin D for our bodies to use - I copied that from the internet somewhere.

I dreamt last night that my parents bought me a new car. A bright red 2004 Chevy Cavalier. Way to dream big, huh?

I mean, it's my dream - I could have chosen anything - Porsche, Bentley, Lamborghini, Prius. Something with some "va-va-vroom", you know. I'm so practical, so reasonable. It had a V8 engine and I remember that detail in particular because I was very excited about how much power my new car would have compared to my old car. I thought that more power meant that I could get to work faster in the morning and not have to deal with traffic. Like a V8 engine meant I could fly to work or something and not have to obey the rules of the road.

When I woke up this morning, and realized that my parents didn't buy me a new car (I'm 30, as if my parents would buy me a new car!) I was a little disappointed. I'm still stuck with poor old Sergio, with his puny 4 cylinders and top speed of 120 km/hr. But I'm quite fond of you anyway and I should stop making you feel inadequate with my talk of faster, more powerful cars. Those Chevy Cavaliers are a dime a dozen, Sergio. You're special to me and I appreciate you. Maybe I'll take you for a car wash and little vacuum action today. Isn't that like the automotive equivalent to a blow job? You lucky car.

debzeppelin @ 2006-04-05T19:05:00

2006-04-05T23:58:34Z

Ok so I'm almost done with week two of my new job. Quick run-down:

* last day at old job was bittersweet. Happy to move forward, sad to leave (some) great peeps behind.
* first day at new job was a cake walk. So was the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th (which was today). The first week was nothing but reading stuff. The second week (this one) is nothing but various training/information sessions. This place sure has their shit together when it comes to informing new hires of how things work.

So in almost two weeks, I've done almost no real work, which is fine by me 'cause I kinda needed a break from that "other place". It feels so good to be gone from there. I'm such a chicken shit when it comes to making big decisions. I hem and haw and sleep on things for months at a time. What can I say? I'm a careful girl. And while many will agree that I am, perhaps, too careful, it's so much a part of my personality that I don't really want to change it - not now, at least. But I know now that I am capable of making moves, shaking things up, if only in a career-related sense. That's a relief, because for a while there, I was worried that maybe I just didn't have it in me and that I would end up as one of those "lifers" - the ones who hate their job, bitch and moan about it all the time, talk about leaving, yet never actually put their money where their mouth is. Granted, it took me more than a year to finally jump ship but I did it eventually. And I feel so much relief, you have no idea.

Things I like about my new job/workplace:
1. It has a cafeteria with a salad bar, a "healthy option" menu choice (so I can make healthy decisions, some of the time) and it's all cheap!
2. I've signed up for cheap yoga classes after work on Mondays
3. I have a name plate on my cubicle - it's new and shiny and silver.
4. I work with a guy whose name is pronounced "Jazz"
5. While I do have to be at work between 8 and 9am (boo!), I get home between 4 and 5pm (yay!)

Things I don't like about my new job/workplace:
1. Even with the shiny name plate, I work in a cubicle. This is the first time I've worked in a cubicle in my life and it's not particularly exciting. I am near a window however, so it's not so bad. I welcome any suggestions as to how to make my cube more appealing.
2. My building (which is very ugly in its own right) is in the most depressing, industrial area of town - when I drive outta there, I want to keep my eyes closed the whole time. That would be dangerous, I know, but I still want to do it to spare myself the ugliness. It's so gross.
3. They have a more strict internet policy (as far as I can tell), which means no Oh No They Didn't, no Gawker/Defamer, no McSweeney's, no Friendster/MySpace, etc. Maybe I can get away with Craigslist, but we'll have to see. I have already decided to throw caution to the wind and have been checking and sending email from my hotmail account. I have only so much self-control.
4. What I thought was going to be the hardest/most unappealing part of this new job has turned out to be kind of a positive and that's the early rising. At the "other place", I would show up whenever I wanted - very lax about that kind of thing. Usually this meant somewhere between 10:30 and 12:30. Nice, eh? Yeah, totally, especially if you went out the night before and stayed up a little past your bedtime. But it also meant that I would have to stay until 6:30 to 8:30pm, sometimes later, to make my 8 hour shift. That part wasn't so fun, but I was in such a rut, there was no way to motivate myself to get out of bed early. Now I have no choice, so it's not really an issue. And turns out it's not so bad, and I L-O-V-E getting home in time to scoff at Dr. Phil on tv. So this is not a dislike after all.

That about does it. What else is new:

1. My digital camera broke down - it's in the shop and won't be back for 2-3 weeks.
2. Went to karaoke again, got busted trying to sneak in booze (Smirnoff Ice - yeah, I'm 12). Killed 'em with my rendition of Eternal Flame.
3. Took further steps to consolidating my credit card debt. I'm on the road to recovery - and perhaps to a mortgage (?!?!)
4. Signed up for a whole summer's worth of tennis lessons. Twice a week (Tuesday evenings, Saturday afternoons) til mid August, starting at the beginning of May. Can't wait.
5. My pal Nicole had a baby boy a few days ago. They named him Jack (short for Jackson) 'cause they love Michael Jackson so much. Kidding. I think it was the only name they could agree on. Or something. Imagine if I named my first born Sting. How awesome would that be?
6. America's Next Top Model has me in its clutches. I must obey. In fact, it's on right now so I have to go.

debzeppelin @ 2006-03-10T16:24:00

2006-03-10T21:27:29Z

So, I'm leaving a job where the owner of the company was named Eugene Melnyk. Slightly odd name, a little funny. Now I'm headed to a job where the company owner's name is Dr. Barry Sherman. Totally normal, not funny at all. But get this: his wife's name is Honey. Now, that's hilarious! I love my new job already.

Good Night and Good Luck

2006-03-08T18:09:33Z

Today, I quit my job and accepted a new one (not in that order).

I'm very nervous.

Whenever someone congratulates me on my new job, I cry.

I'm happy to move on and up, but I'm sad to leave some of the really fantastic peeps I have here.

More on this later.

Where Frisbees Are Forever Floating Through The Air

2006-03-04T20:16:12Z

Who's the pretty puppy? You are, yes, you are.

I love you Casey, and I'll miss you. I'm especially sad for my mom, who loves you like a child and who is so devastated right now I want nothing more than to jump on a plane to Florida and try to comfort her. It's true, 15 years is a long time to know someone, but that's also a really long life for a pooch and you had a tremendous go. To be so loved by one of the greatest ladies in the world; we should all be so lucky.

I've known you for half of my life and you've known me for all of yours. That's pretty cool, really. I'm glad I had a chance to see you in January, to see how you were doing, give you hugs and say "see you, buddy". Say hi to Fluffy, Gray, Scardey, Ti-Mine, Derby, Cosmo, Tuna and all those guys for me, will ya?

Some Links for Kicks

2006-03-02T05:57:16Z

Can you imagine how nice it would be?

As mentioned in last week's Now Magazine, Cute Overload. You're gonna have to brush your teeth afterwards.

Suspicious Minds is my all-time favourite Elvis song. Vote! Vote! Vote!

I don't know whether admire or despise the Cobrasnake. I mean, I can take pictures of dumb drunk hipsters too, but nobody pays me for it. Yeah, I think I despise him.

Oh, happy belated Mardi Gras, by the way.

Things I don't get

2006-03-02T04:15:23Z

The 2006 Nissan X-Trail commercial
Laguna Beach
Halifax Style Donairs

Cartoon Love

2006-03-01T23:40:09Z

Have you seen this man?

Sadly, he's unrecognizable due to some kind of unknown spillage. But it used to be a drawing I made of an animé cartoon character from a cartoon I used to watch was I was a kid. It played in the late seventies or early eighties and it was about a group of slender, good-looking space people who wore leotards and had capes (or maybe they had wings?). This particular character was a young boy space cadet; he was so pretty that I had a small childhood crush on him (yes, I am aware that he's a cartoon - tell me you've never had cartoon crushes in your youth!). I can't remember if he had beautiful hair or if he wore a helmet/visor now ... but I do know he wore white and maybe some red and/or yellow. Anyway, after a cursory search of the Internet for his likeness, the only thing that sort of resembles the image in my mind's eye is this:

They're from a show called "Battle of the Planets", I think. In that pic, the little boy is not wearing white, and he's kind of a nerd. The little boy I remember crushing on was way cooler than that ... and I'm pretty sure he wore white. The "dad" in this picture is closer to what I remember of the little boy, however, I don't remember having a crush on an old man cartoon (gross). Maybe my memory is playing tricks on me - I was probably around 5 or 6 anyway, so it's totally possible that I have no idea what I'm talking about. Anyway, that pic is pretty close to what I'm thinking of, stylistically, at least. If you know of any other cartoons that kind of have that same look for its characters, let me know. It's been bothering me all week.

Anniversaries

2006-03-01T19:11:44Z

A. Today (or yesterday, I'm not sure) is the four (4) month anniversary of when I quit smoking.

B. Today (I'm sure of this one) is the one (1) year anniversary of when I moved downtown.

C. Today (approximately) is the one (1) month anniversary of when Denise stopped talking to me.

First, A. It was eerily easy to quit smoking this time around (I had tried and succeeded for about a year back in 1998). I attribute my success to the fact that I was so sick for the first 5 days that I could barely speak, let alone smoke. They say that's the hardest part, the first few days. That's probably true. In the more than 10 years (!!) that I smoked, I could never stop myself from smoking even if I was sick. Through head colds and head lacerations, I smoked through it all. But this time, it was physically impossible - like trying to run a marathon right after breaking both your legs. So that took care of the first bit. The rest of it (ie, the last 3.75 months) has been pretty easy too, all things considered. I made it through NYE without lighting up, which I was a little nervous about. I also think the winter had some hand in keeping me smoke-free - I don't really want to go out in the cold, you know? I feel like I should be prouder (more proud?) of my accomplishment, but I'm still not feeling it. I have yet to notice any tangible, concrete benefit from having quit smoking. I don't really feel any better (well, I never felt bad in the first place). I find this a little weird. Oh well, what is that expression about looking a gift horse in the mouth? I think the gist of that expression is "don't do it". So I'll just be grateful to whomever/whatever it was that made quitting smoking so easy for me.

Now, B. March 1st, 2005 was my official first day at my new apartment. I remember being so in love with it and all the possibilities it held for my social life. And sure enough, so many of those possiblities came to fruition, in so many awesome ways. I had one of the most terrific summers on record last year, thanks in no small part to my proximity to all my favourite friends, Trinity Bellwoods Park and a whack of sunny/moonlit patios. I still love it and I'm looking forward to a record setting summer this year. The completion of the Easy Mixtape will be a love letter to my new apartment - I can't wait for it to be done. It's like a collage made up of songs instead of pictures, and all the songs remind me of the best summer ever. It makes me smile right now just to think about it.

And finally, C. Still no progress on the defunct friendship. I have tried the 'so friendly, it hurts' approach and it's going nowhere fast. I'm getting real sick of the one-word answers and cold-shoulder. You can only be so nice to someone for so long without any form of reciprocation. I'm reaching my wit's end as far as this so-called friendship is concerned and am considering cutting my losses and making it official. It breaks my heart to do it, but really, anybody who refuses to show some compassion to a friend who's sobbing the words "Please, help me understand what's happening here" is no friend of mine. That's just plain mean. And every day that goes by without a word spoken between us, it gets easier to just get used to it. Wow - I can't remember the last time I seriously had friendship end so definitively. Come to think of it ... never - that's never happened to me before. I've had friendships starve and die from lack of attention, the kind of death where the phrase "grown apart" is often used. But never this suddenly and (to me) inexplicably. So, on the great big check list of life experiences, I can check that one off, I guess.

So, how am I to celebrate all these anniversaries? Leave work early? Check. Go shopping? Sure! Have a drink or two? Maybe! Who's with me?! If you read this [and you know me] and you'd like to have a celebratory drink with me tonight, give me a call. I deserve it!!

It's such a fine line between stupid and clever

2006-02-27T17:31:14Z

While reading a review for AIDS Wolf's LP, The Lovvers, I came across the funniest concluding sentence I've read in a music review in ... maybe forever. It's reminiscent of Spinal Tap's infamous "shit sandwich" 2-word review, which makes me giggle to no end. Pitchfork's Brandon Stosuy didn't care for the album much (he gave it a 3.9) and had this to say to wrap up his review:

"For now, let's just call it shit in wolf's clothing."

Thanks Brandon, that totally made my day!!

debzeppelin @ 2006-02-26T13:11:00

2006-02-26T19:15:49Z

What was supposed to be a quick little bite turned into a culinary adventure last night. I was excited to have Korean food for the first time, so I guess it was gonna be an adventure for me no matter what happened. I was to meet Jonathan and Liz at Joon's, which I did. Sadly, though, Joon's was way too crowded and I had a limited amount of time in which to have dinner. We decided to not wait there and go up and over to this place at Bloor and Euclid. I don't even know what it's called - the only English words on the sign were "Korean Restaurant" - but the sign is bright and orange and cute and you can see it from Bloor. We ended up having to wait about 10 minutes for a table there too, but in the end, it was totally worth it. They have the kind of little tables were you have to take off your shoes and sit on the floor, which was a first for me and kind of fun. Turns out the specialty of the house is this kind of Korean sausage, which was featured in one form or another in all the items on the menu. Feeling not quite so brave as to dive into unknown sausage soup, we opted instead for Korean BBQ, which was still new to me. Turns out it just a bunch of meat that you grill up right on your table, and it's quite delish. I swear, there must have been 5 pounds of raw beef on that plate and we ate it all.

Jonathan and Edie - pre-meat

Debbie and Liz - pre-meat

Liz pondering her dilema. As a vegetarian, there weren't a lot of options for her.

If you don't count seafood as meat, then this pancake didn't break any rules. It was also very delicious.

This is our clean, fresh griddle/skillet - I don't know what it's called. It cooks the meat.

Come aboard, we're expecting you.

2006-02-21T06:25:15Z

A couple of photos from my cruise - Belize and Costa Rica, respectively. The rest of 'em are over here - I'm not done adding the comments to the photos yet, but you can pretty much get the idea. Since I've not whittled them down to the best set they can be, there's alot of them, so don't judge.

Crazy Cat Lady

2006-02-21T05:56:30Z

A little back story -- while discussing the topic of dating deal breakers, my friend Scott claimed that if a girl had photos of herself proudly holding up her cats posted on her blog/friendster profile/myspace, that would be a deal breaker for him. As soon as I got home that night, I took these photos and immediately put them up on my friendster profile. We all got a good laugh out of it. Some more than others. To wit:

Liz dear, these are just for you. Come back and look at them whenever you need a laugh.

This is so embarrassing, yet so funny at the same time, I have to put it up here.

Never Say Never

2006-02-19T21:00:20Z

I learned a lesson in never saying never this weekend. In September of 2004, I said never; I even put it in writing. What with the debilitating stage fright, I figured it was a pretty safe bet that I wouldn't ever voluntarily belt out tunes at the top of my lungs in front of anyone but my cats. Doing Karaoke has been on my "not for me list" longer than electroclash and having babies. So I was duly surprised when I not only chose to do it, but became a bit of a mic hog! I'm still a little in disbelief.

Oddly enough, I didn't choose to sing Dead Or Alive OR My Cherie Amour, which I had then chosen as my go-to songs if ever I needed to sing to save my life. Well, for one, My Cherie Amour wasn't on the list ... I didn't even check for Dead or Alive, though if I had stumbled upon it, I probably would have done it up. Instead, I started off sweet and sappy and didn't stray far from that ethos all night. A little Chicago ditty (If You Leave Me Now), a little Elton (Daniel), a little Heart (Alone), a little Lionel (Hello). Let me not forget the embarrassing stab at Huey Lewis and Gwyneth Paltrow's Cruisin' and Lulu's To Sir With Love. Finally, an impactful duet for me and Liz with Black Sabath's Paranoid and a couple of rousing group finale songs (Modest Mouse's Float On and Aerosmith's Crazy).

And because I have the best friends in the world, they all seem to think that I did a lovely job, which is nice of them to say. And simply because I want to, I'm going to believe them. I think that had we not rented a little (and impeccably decorated!) private room, I don't know that I would have found the bravado to try it. But it doesn't really matter now - all that matters is that my Karaoke Cherry is popped. And just like other cherry-popping activities, it'll just get better the more you do it. Clickety-click down here for more:

I'm So Glad We're Friends - Or Are We?

2006-02-16T16:30:16Z

Dear whoever reads this,

One of my best friends "broke up" with me a couple of weeks ago. She maintains that we're still friends, however, she's chosen to speak to me only when spoken to. And even then, her answers are short and cold - cold as ice. When I told her today that it hurt me deeply that she's chosen to act this way towards me, she said, and I quote, "That's unfortunate". That was followed by a lot of "I'm sorry you feel that way" and "I don't know what you want me to say". To the latter question, I told her I wanted her to say something nice, to show me that she still cares about me, 'cause I've had nothing to go on for the past couple of weeks, you know. She said, "Like what?". Ouch.

If you read this, please, please, please, say something nice about me. And if you have to ask me "like what?", I'll take that to mean that you, also, don't really want to be my friend anymore.

Love,

Debbie

Take a guess...

2006-02-12T23:32:01Z

Meeting lovely little Allison for the first time, or

reading about tonight's Extreme Makeover - Home Edition plot outline on the on-screen TV Guide?

My Pavlovian response to anything EM-HE related has reached ridiculous proportions. It used to be that I could watch the show, and I would get misty near the end, when they revealed the new house to the poor people that didn't have a good house before. Then it was crying at the middle, when they revealed some of the special surprises they had in store for the house/family (like an elevator for the little girl in the wheelchair, or an in-house recording studio for the little diva that wanted to be a big pop star, etc). Then it was an almost immediate reaction to just the theme song (which isn't really much of a song at all), coupled with spontaneous tears at any and all promotional spots for the show on TV. Now, all I have to do is read about what (or who) this week's episode is going to be about, and I lose it. This is so stupid.

p.s. Allison is a baby that I know. She's under one month old and she's really quite cute. She did not, however, make me cry. Try to be more like Ty Pennington, Alli, and then we'll talk.

debzeppelin @ 2006-02-03T21:33:00

2006-02-04T03:33:02Z

I was doing well for a while, putting stuff up and whatnot... lost track and forgot. I even had a couple of entries for my "Easy Mix Tape" that I had jotted down and now I lost track of those, too. The only one that I remember was that Sean Paul ditty ... shake that ting, miss kana kana (a little google search tells me it's called "Get Busy") and I was reminded how much I like that song without really knowing what it was called. So that's track #10. I figure I'm about at the half-way mark. I can't wait to hear it all together.

I did go on the cruise of which I spoke in November and I will get my shit together and post that business up on the internet sooner or later. It was certainly a memorable experience and those who know me well will understand why I'm choosing that very specific wording. One of these days, I'll elaborate. Not right now though.

I treat myself with the strangest things and sometimes it doesn't always pan out. Today, as a special treat for myself for a hard-ish week, I went to Canadian Tire and bought myself a new pair of windshield wipers. Not just the cheepy Motomaster basic model. Nah-ah. These are the "Reflex" wipers, the creme de la creme, top of the heap kind of wipers. The driver side one cost about $24, the passenger side one about $23. That's ridiculous, right? Yeah, I know, it is. Sigh.
Anyway, that's not what I was getting at. As if $50 in car parts wasn't 'treat' enough, I also bought a water-proof radio for the shower. I've always wanted one of those, you know, the kind you hang right in the shower so you can listen to the radio while you're getting clean. Something about that seems so indulgent, yet so efficient at the same time. What's the news of the day? Well, I've got a good 10-15 minutes to kill while I'm in the shower, why don't I tune my little shower radio to AM680? While the shampoo is rinsing out of my hair, I wonder what's going on at the CBC? I can check right now (oh Anna Maria Tremonti ... sometimes you can be such an antagonistic bitch!!)!! Hey, Roger, Rick & Marilyn!! I feel like singing ... CHUM FM, hit me up with that new Madonna song, 'cause I just learned all the words and I'm gonna wow your pants off!! It's obvious why that was an exciting purchase. How much do you want to rush out right now and get one?

Well, a word to the wise. Don't get the Curtis RS55 Sport Series one. It doesn't work. New batteries and all - nothing. Shit. I'm debastated. And wondering if perhaps I didn't deserve such great treats after all.

debzeppelin @ 2005-12-25T00:30:00

2005-12-25T05:58:19Z

Is Catholicism dying or is it just Kapuskasing? I learned yesterday (Christmas Eve) that my old neighbourhood church, the one where I was baptized, had my first communion, my first confession, my confirmation, has been shut down. My friend and her husband bought a couple of the old church pews for 20 bucks a piece. I don't know why exactly, but when I heard the news, I was sad. Like a part of my childhood had died, I guess. My family was never really the church-going type, but we went every now and then. I remember all the classes from Jeanne Mance would march on over to the church and we'd have a special mass just for us students, in the middle of the school day. I wonder if they still do that for other schools around here... I'll have to ask. So Merry Christmas, Jesus!! For your birthday, we're evicting you from your house!!

I wonder what the town will do with the big empty church building now. And just like a small town, the rumour mill is working overtime. Some say new library, some say old folks activity centre, what have you. I propose luxury loft condominiums. Imagine, those vaulted ceilings, those stained glass windows. If you can get over the fact that your house used to be the house of The Lord and that it'll stink to high heaven of incense, then you're set.

You asked for it

2005-12-24T19:11:48Z

James Spader is the man of my perverse dreams. I agree that he's a little creepy/sleazy (at least the characters he's played) but that's right up my alley and, of course, the reason for the appeal. It's the "Crash"/"Secretary" combo that did it for me. IMDb says he played "Steff" in Pretty In Pink ... that's a weird name for a boy. That Spader, always thinking outside the box.

Spader, circa Secretary:

I think that he's looking pretty rough these days though ... whatev, I'd still hit it.

debzeppelin @ 2005-12-22T09:45:00

2005-12-22T15:25:19Z

I continue to believe in Karma because, quite simply, it's been true for me. I keep testing it on myself and it seems to work out almost every time. I was recently faced with the moral dilemma to either keep or return a $100 gift card that was given to me a sort of bribe at work, from a company that desperately wants to do business with us. After a lot of hemming and hawing (and some last minute scrambling to restore the gift card to its original condition, for I had, at one point the in hemming and hawing, decided to keep it) I ultimately turned in the gift to my boss, so that she could raffle it off within our company. Apparently, when that happens, the gift is no longer considered a bribe, just a gift between professionals.
So after the card was returned, I was immediately relieved and cleared of guilt. I knew keeping it was a bad idea ... and the feeling that I got when I gave it back just cemented that for me and I knew I had done right by my conscience. So my boss and her assistant organize the raffle for this gift card ... 50 or so names in a hat, everyone gathered in a sloppy circle ... hand in the hat ... out comes a little slip of paper ... Debbie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could hardly believe it. And I really think that Karmic forces were at work to ensure that I would be rewarded in kind for having subscribed to the "honesty is the best policy" ... er ... policy. It's just that much more incentive to keep things on the up and up in my life. So I now am the completely legitimate owner of a $100 Sears gift card, which I've already used - on myself! Have I spat in the face of the gods by indulging myself in my good fortune? I tried to use it to benefit others, honestly I did. But Sears doesn't carry SpongeBob SquarePants stuff (which is what I need to get) so I stocked up on my favourite perfume at the Clinique counter. Ahhh, the sweet smell of success. Once they get whiff of me, even the gods will agree that I've done the right thing.

debzeppelin @ 2005-12-20T21:53:00

2005-12-21T03:23:43Z

I should be Christmas shopping. Correction: I should be done Christmas shopping. I'm such a fucking cliché - so predictable. But the reason I got to this point this year is not simply a matter of having wasted time. I really thought that I was just going to stay in Toronto and not do anything for Christmas this year. Part of me kind of wanted to do that. Part of me still does. For the last 4-5 years, my parents have left for Florida around the middle of November. That means nobody's at the family manse over the holidays. So, in the past, I would drive the ~1000km to Kapuskasing to stay in that big cold house all by myself (the flight to visit Mom and Dad in FL at Christmas is just too expensive for me - I postpone my visit with them till January, usually). I would visit the few (but precious) friends that still live there and it wasn't so bad, especially when all 3 of my precious Kap friends were home for the holidays at the same time. This year, only one friend will be around. And she's got a 2 year old. And she's 6 months pregnant.

So I essentially have two viable options for the holidays. Stay or go. In staying here, I have all the comforts of my cozy little apartment. I have pretty fancy cable and fast internet. I have 24-hours convenience stores and I'm pretty sure I could get my hands on some weed if I tried hard enough. Tell me that doesn't sound like a pretty good setting for a solid week of self-indulgence. I don't have to do anything until January 3rd, if I don't want to ... imagine all I could do! I could get my skates sharpened and have a go at ice skating for first time of the season. I could paint my living room. I could organize my photos, my junk drawer and plan out my cruise outfits. I could read erotica and masturbate all day. I can post shit on livejournal (but not about that last bit ... this isn't that kind of lj). The possibilities are endless. The only downside (and unfortunately, it's a big one) is that I will have to suffer the stigma of spending the holidays (specifically, Christmas eve/day) alone. From the perspective of 5 days pre-Christmas, this does not seem like such a big deal to me. But who knows? Come Christmas Eve, when I'm alone at the Kap house (not watching TV: there's no cable there, not on the internet: there's no computer there), I might feel differently and wish with all my might that I had somewhere to go. Somewhere where I'm not the poor girl who doesn't have a family. Somewhere where I'm not the weird 30 year old "lady" who doesn't belong anywhere. I mean, no matter where I decide to go, I will either be alone or somewhere I don't belong. What's worse? I'm going to stay at my parents' house, so I will wake up alone on Christmas morning, just like I wake up alone every other morning (I know, boo-hoo-hoo). At some point in the morning, I'll get dressed and go over to Nicole's house and bust in on her family's Christmas morning, complete with hyper dog and excited toddler. Would you want to do that? It makes me tear up to think that it's my only real option. But I'm going anyway. I don't know why. I seriously love her and her family and all that, but it's clearly not where I'm supposed to be. I guess if money was no object, I'd be in Florida, with my mom and dad. It's like $600 to go there at Christmas time. It's like $200 to go in January. By my math, that equals Kapuskasing for Christmas. It's gonna be a long drive. Feels shorter on the way back, though.